The less-spoken about realities of the opportunity to study abroad
'Maseeng Masitha
If you ever get an opportunity to study around the globe, go for it. Do it for yourself. What I will say though is that it will be as much an opportunity as it is a risk. Many a time we are only focused on seeing ourselves there; we do not consider that the same goals we aspire towards in the far-away land may very well be attained in the home-country or closer to home. I am not discouraging anyone from going to see other parts of the world, to pursue their career on a world stage. On the contrary, I think it’s a worth-while experience. What isn’t right though is glossing over the other details that come with this worth-while experience. It distorts and even trivializes the challenges associated with moving one’s life abroad, and I think more significantly, it deprives both the diaspora community and the travel aspirants of fully appreciating and addressing the accommodations that necessitate this major physical, mental and emotional transition.
If you ever get an opportunity to study around the globe, go for it. Do it for yourself.
Whilst the first step to enable the move is a feat on its own with many people looking to acquire a scholarship, that is only the first step. There follows a lot of planning once this is approved, for what happens once there and the after-life of graduation? What we don’t see on social media platforms is the anxiety of leaving the security of the scholar institution. It could go a lot smoother if coming from a place of experience or mentoring. I was naïve about how things would fall into place after completing my degree. The immigrant experience is by no means a monolith, but it is safe to say we all have enough uncertainties: navigating the procurement of the internship and transitioning into the job market. You are one of the lucky ones if your uncertainties begin at this point, and not with the stress of making ends meet for living expenses and rent in a country dubbed the richest economy especially coming from a lower-middle class economy, sometimes less. Desperation hits in different forms after the initial optimism of the endless opportunities everyone speaks of.
The immigrant experience is by no means a monolith, but it is safe to say we all have enough uncertainties: navigating the procurement of the internship and transitioning into the job market.
For me, personally, it was the first time I needed to secure a job (as means of survival, not extra allowance or personal inquisitiveness) whilst pursuing my studies. I did have a substantial contribution towards tuition through a scholarship and a balance for the tuition figured out by my immediate family, but it was down to me to meet my living expenses. There were instances between jobs when I had to look to the benevolence of donors so that I could focus more on my studies. Those were emotionally trying times, feeling self-conscious for not being self-sufficient. Getting stuff for free sounds fun when it’s a surprise gesture, but to go to a food pantry or ask for an extension on rent due is a whole new level of emotional vulnerability. It’s an internal conflict about your values or work ethics as a person, who you see yourself as, and it opens you up to unhealthy dependencies on relationships you shouldn’t be entering. I also had periods of doing just enough to produce assignment deliverables and maintain a job on the side for minimum wage to the point where one of my professors was surprised to see I’m still around had it not been for my assignment submission.
As I was undergoing these stressors, I felt embarrassed to have to decline invites to social events to circumvent the contributions to participate in the activities, or otherwise accept charity. The worst part was not this though; the worst part was having to decline opportunities to advance myself because they required at least some level of access to resources in order to redeem the opportunity. I declined some internships and jobs due to limitations of transport and accommodations. Then went back to the drawing board –aiming higher for competitive salaries, only to be squashed by the competition from people with higher qualifications, or extensive work experience, or simply becoming the last choice after the citizens have been considered. I was lucky if I was told upfront that my immigration status is something they are not going to work around. So, I took low-paid jobs or part-time work without benefits to build experience.
There are times when I look to my peers who had a different path and carved their way locally and I hope they know success comes in many forms and can be found in any place.
I would like to tell you that after that, problem solved, I have it all figured out now, but that wouldn’t be the entire truth. I have ample experiences to date, good and bad, from facing all the unexpected detours of living the student life abroad. I have met lots of people from different walks of life who have made me wiser the hard way, and others who have enriched my life in ways I don’t know how to give gratitude yet. I made connections with people who know a lot more than I do and have shared their personal and professional spaces with me even when I felt less than worthy. I made the most intimate and vulnerable friendships from shared hardships. We learned to build and look out for one another. We exchange knowledge, and continue to be a part of one another’s lives beyond school. Amidst the chaos of making a life here, I met my husband. He is nothing short of selfless and more importantly, is able to see all that is possible in our partnership so long as we keep focused on improving each other and giving encouragement during the ups and downs. From day one, we have been determined. I currently working part-time which a lot of times frustrates me financially, but I am blessed with our baby coming into a loving, caring and stable home, with a lot of support from our family. There are times when I look to my peers who had a different path and carved their way locally and I hope they know success comes in many forms and can be found in any place. It is about impact on people which I am still working on. I urge everyone to not take things at face value captured from one really good angle.
